CHAPTER 15
SWB: Akinsehinwa Oluwaseun
I was shivering and crying bitterly, I guess the way I shouted Dunmininu’s name had attracted one of her neighbors, his name is Eddie.
He rushed in and when he met the scene he staggered and almost fell.
“What an horrible sight! What happened?” He asked.
“Please just go and get an ambulance, a car , anything, let’s take her to the hospital” I answered placing Dunmininu’s head on my laps.
“Okay let me get a cab from the junction, it may take forever for an ambulance to get here” he stormed out of the house while Dunmininu held my hands with her right hand while her left hand gripped her stomach.
“He had the gut…..to come here…….and blame me……he said it was all my fault that he had told me earlier to hold on until he was ready for marriage.
He confirmed it that they were his family…..the pregnant woman and those three children, they are his. I was aborting my own babies while he was busy making his own with another woman.
He said she gave him sleeping pills and that was why he couldn’t come for the introduction, that liar!……he said he didn’t know how she got the address to my family house…….and then he said everything was all my fault, that I should have agreed to abort this one again. Hmnnn, he said he still loved me. love? He even wanted to sleep with me again after all he did.
I killed him Nifemi, I was mad, I killed him. The times he raped me when I was sick and couldn’t satisfy his sexual urge.
My salvation that I compromised because of him, the hope of making heaven that I tampered with…..”
“Dunmininu God can still amend things, it’s never too late. We’ll take you to the hospital once the cab arrives, you’ll be fine again. The grace of God will speak for you again. I’ll get you a very good lawyer once you are fine, okay ?” As I was talking,I was weeping, she was in my arms, she kept getting weaker and weaker by the seconds.
“Nifemi it’s too late……you warned me not to take God’s grace for granted. You told me not to exhaust my own portion of grace. God used you to warn me but I was blinded , I said age was no longer on my side, now the marriage I traded my salvation for, did it happen eventually? I was a Christian who taught other people about heaven but Iook at where I’m heading to.
Nifemi please if you have the chance help me use the story of my life to teach a lesson, for other Christians like me to learn from.
Tell them they still have the chance to repent now when the banner of God’s mercy has not yet been rolled away. Tell those who are indulging in one secret sin or the other and coming publicly to criticize others of one sin or the other to depart from hypocrisy. Tell those who are committing sins and saying God will understand, after all we are all humans to depart from iniquity. Tell them God is still patient with them because He’s still thinking they’ll repent and forsake their evil ways. Remind them that no matter how little sin is the wages is still death. Tell them they still have the chance to repent now. Tell them not to take God’s grace for granted, tell them…….uhcugh” Dunmininu coughed out blood and I screamed.
“Jesuuuuuuuuus!!!! Uncle Eddie, uncle Eddie where is he? Dunmininu please stay with me”
“It’s too late Nifemi, thanks for being a very good friend”
“Please let’s pray, Jesus can still forgive, just tell Him to….”
“Don’t stress yourself Nifemi, they are here already, I can see their wicked faces staring at me”
“Who? Who is here? Jesus please just one more chance for Dunmininu, Jesus you said….. you said if any should confess his sins you are just and faithful to forgive” I said crying aloud.
“I can feel some hotness, Nifemi I’m closer to the pit burning with sulphur. My soul is drifting away. They are here to take me there” Tears flowed from her eyes as she coughed again and blood came out.
“Nifemi please do all you can to make sure you don’t see the wrath of God. If you don’t make heaven it will be double pain for me. I know it’s too late for me but you, make sure you don’t join me in that horrible pit burning forever and ever. Goodbye Nif…….”
Her neck dropped as she breathed her last.
“Dunmininu nooooooooo, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, this isn’t your promise, Jesus” My tears were hot as they flowed ceaselessly, just then Eddie came back.
“The cab is here, let’s take her to the hospital” he said and I didn’t know what else happened but I knew I collapsed.
Today is Dunmininu’s burial, her body was taken to Ikare to be buried in her father’s house. The police called Eddie and I for questioning but thank God for the two exhibits that spelt out that we knew nothing about the murder and suicide. The knife with which Smith was killed had Dunmininu’s finger print on it, plus she dropped a suicide note before taking that portion.
My husband held me as I continued weeping standing by the grave where Dunmininu will be laid to rest forever, rest I say, Hmn. My dream played back in my mind. That terrible dream where I saw Dunmininu burning in a pit and asking for a drop of water but I couldn’t help her. My eyes were red and swollen. We could hear Mama Dunmininu crying from her room, she was surrounded by several people who had come to mourn with them and so was Baba Dunmininu. The atmosphere was tensed.
My mind kept ruminating over all that Dunmininu said. Fear gripped my heart aside the sorrow that hovered round it. How do I confess my own sin to my husband? Will Richard ever forgive me? Won’t I be exposed to ridicule?
I have not been to my place of work since three days ago that the incident happened. Mr Jude has been calling and sending several messages to apologise. At a time, I had to block his number. Amara too called me and I explained to her that I lost a friend and will be going for her burial. Some church members, neighbors , Richard and I came to Ikare for the burial. Everyone was crying bitterly, several people said good things about her. A girl even said it was Dunmininu that helped her to pay her school fees when she wanted to drop out of the secondary school because of lack of money. Dunmininu was really good, she was kindhearted and soft only that she allowed the devil use that satanic Smith take away eternity with God from her.
“For it is appointed unto man once to die after this the judgement” The Pastor began the sermon before Dunmininu will be finally buried.
“Brethren let’s think deeply and ask ourselves where am I going after death? When I will close my eyelids in death where will I open it to? Heaven a place of everlasting comfort or hell a place of everlasting torment? Remember if you miss heaven you can never miss hell. What is that stain in your life that will make God say to you, get away from me thou workers of iniquity, I never knew you? Come to the cross today and let the blood of Jesus wash it away. Remember Christ is coming for a church without spot or wrinkle. Thou fornicator, thou adulterers, liars, drunkards, swindlers, ritualists, hypocrites, revellers, witch, cultist, wizards, herbalist, Yahoo gangs, thieves, destiny destroyer, side chics, husband and wife snatchers, you who has not forgiven that person who sinned against you, that woman who has four children and only two among them is for your husband , the remaining two are for your concubine but your husband doesn’t know, he thinks he’s the father of all the children, that man that has children with concubines but your wife thinks you are a saint, all those who cover their dirty linen with a pure white garment, Galatians 5:19-21 says more. Repent now while there’s still a chance. The Lord can call you home at anytime, He doesn’t work by any man’s time table, what if He calls you today?. Those of you singing in the choir, ushering in the church, teaching during Sunday school , acting dramas, rendering one service or the other in God’s house, members of the congregation, whether you are working for God or not, every hidden sin shall be brought to judgement. Stop toying with God’s patience. Repent now that you are still alive. Pastors repent of every hidden sin. Abih you want to go to hell and be conducting service there ni?
If you are here and you want to give your life to Jesus or you are a backslider and you want to come back to the open wide arms of the Savior begin to confess your sins……….”
I had left the place because as the Pastor was preaching, I was no longer comfortable, the thoughts of my adulterous acts flooded my mind. I went into the car in deep thoughts. I was mourning for Dunmininu and I was also thinking of my own unconfessed sin.
The burial ended, the grave was sealed up, Dunmininu is never coming back to this world. She’s gone forever. Gone to face her Maker to give an account of the way she lived her life here on earth. There was no other chance, her fate is sealed. My husband stood by me all through the period I was mourning Dunmininu. We went back to Abuja after the burial and everything wasn’t the same again. I was cool, refusing to say anything to anyone. My heart didn’t stop pricking me. I regretted all my actions.
Mr Jude used another number to send me a message, he kept apologising and did not stop professing his love to me. In his tone he wanted me to divorce my husband and marry him. He said I could take my time till I was ready to resume work but I have made up my mind, I’m never going back to that company again.
A week has passed and I’m yet to confess my act of unfaithfulness to my husband. I needed to see a counselor but I didn’t know the right person to speak to. Tracy will be a bad option, who knows if Jude had told her what happened between us. My Mom called again to warn me that she had a dream about me and I must embark on a three days fasting and prayers, this time I decided to obey this time because I knew danger was looming. Richard became so caring and loving even more than before, he thought the reason I haven’t been going to work for the past one week was because I was still mourning Dunmininu but when it got to the third week and I still didn’t resume, he asked me if there was any other problem aside from the mourning part. I couldn’t confess to him, I only told him I wanted to have a change of job. He asked me if I would like to work in his late father’s company and I said I’ll think about it. Wednesday of the third week away from work, Mr Jude came to my house. How dare he? I thought. Thank God Richard had gone to work, whatever we discussed remained between us.
“Nifemi please don’t hate me for what happened. I know it’s hard but please forgive me and try to forgive yourself too” he said staring pleadingly at me.
“I want you out of my house right away. I want you out of my life forever. Jude I have forgiven you but please leave my husband and I alone. I will never divorce him for you, let that sink into your senses” I spoke angrily, he paused for a while before speaking.
“I have always loved you Nifemi, Richard was just faster, if he had not been faster, you would have been my wife,Mrs Fredrick instead of Mrs Thomas by now”
“To hell with Mrs Fredrick. Get out Jude, whatever happened between us was a mistake and that’s the last time it will ever happen. I don’t ever want……..” I suddenly felt like throwing up, I haven’t been feeling well for some days now and I knew it’s because I have not been eating well. Dunmininu’s death really shook me that I lost my appetite for long. The loss of appetite was coupled with dizziness.
“Urrrrrrrhg” I was rushing to the nearest bathroom to vomit whatever it is that was coming out of my belly but I couldn’t hold it, I threw up half way. Mr Jude quickly came closer and placed his hand on me asking if I was alright but I shoved his hands off me. He sighted a mop nearby and picked it up, he cleaned up the mess, washed the mopping stick while I sat down weakly.
“You need to leave now Jude, please leave”
“I can’t leave you in this condition Nifemi” I stood up and used the remaining strength in me to push him out. He didn’t want me to hurt myself, so he left promising to visit again. I was really angry at him, how could he come to my matrimonial home uninvited, especially after what happened between us. I thought it will be wiser to confess to my husband before Jude gets me into more trouble but I didn’t know how to go about the confession, how will Richard react to it? The dizziness and loss of appetite refused to go, I threw up again the following morning and my husband said I needed to visit the hospital.
Two days later, on a Saturday night, my husband woke me up and said he has something important he wanted to discuss with me. I was worried and afraid. I hope my secret hasn’t been revealed to him. I hope he didn’t read any of those messages Jude sent before they were deleted?
“Oluwanifemi, my heart beat, my Sunshine, Adunni mi” he prostrated before me and I kept staring speechlessly at him.
“What’s he about to say?”
“I want you to forgive me because I have really offended you” he said and I swallowed hard before speaking.
“Richy what happened?”
“Will you forgive me?” He asked.