CHAPTER 10
SWB: Akinsehinwa Oluwaseun.
“I’m sorry sir, please just take me back to the office let me get my car” I said finally after realizing I had spit out too much to my Boss’ hearing.
“Nifemi what’s the problem” Mr Jude asked calmly holding my hands in his.
“I …I …..” I knew it will be wrong of me to confide in him, especially after hearing from him that he has a soft spot for me. No matter how desperate I am for a confidant to speak to, I could never confide in him.
“I don’t like the way your cousin spoke to me” I said and he took a deep breath before speaking.
“I’m sorry dear, I should have told you a little about her before bringing you down here. You see Tracy can be somehow funny, maybe a bit crazy” he smiled and then continued.
“It takes someone who is so patient to enjoy and gain from her counseling section. At the beginning you’ll be confused as to where is she heading to, you might even become defensive because it will appear as if she is trying to attack your personality.
But if you can be patient enough you’ll get to know that all those strategies were just for her to help you find a solution from the angle you were not expecting. She is crazy I know but she is one of the best counselor I have ever met, trust me I’m not being sentimental”
“So that’s the way she was taught her own counseling courses in the university? Going about asking embarrassing questions from people?” I asked putting up my upper lip scornfully while Mr Jude laughed.
“I like the look on your face anytime you do that” he said while imitating me and I waved my hands in the air, I wasn’t in the mood for any of his jokes.
“You need to calm down dear” he said.
Everyone is just telling me to calm down, Mr Jude , Crazy Tracy and my husband tell me to calm down. It’s really easy to advise troubled souls to calm down when you are not in their shoes. If Richard was the one in my shoes, then he’ll understand the gravity of what he has done. If Mr Jude were to be in my shoes, he will not even remember the word calm not to talk of down. And that crazy Tracy I’m sure if she were to be in my shoes, she would have filed for a divorce.
“Would you like to go back in there?” Mr Jude asked me bringing me back from my subconsciousness.
“Nope, maybe some other day but not today. I can’t stay a minute with her”
“Alright then, let me just drive you home, I’ll order one of the securities to bring your car to your house. Is that okay by you?”
I couldn’t turn down the offer because I was really too angry to drive.
“Okay sir, thanks a lot for stressing this much because of me”
“You deserve better Oluwanifemi, so how far? Have you changed your mind?”
“About what?” I asked not certain of what he meant.
“I mean are you coming for my birthday party?”
“Let’s be hopeful sir. I’m not yet sure”
“Alright then, let’s be hopeful like she said” he said looking at the rear view mirror.
Mr Jude dropped me off at the gate and I appreciated his kind gesture before going into my matrimonial home.
“Welcome Love” Richard greeted as he walked up to me, planted a kiss on my cheek and collected my bag.
“What happened to your car Babe?”
“Nothing, I just couldn’t drive it, someone is bringing it though”
”What happened to you? Are you sick” he had started to touch my head, neck, hands, checking everywhere to be sure I was alright but none of it moved me.
“I’m fine Richy, there is nothing wrong with me” I shouted at him.
“I’m sorry I just wanted to be sure you are alright”
“Thanks I’m fine” I said sharply.
“We need to talk Nifemi”
“Please Richy I’m tired, I’m just coming back from work, I need to rest”
“I’m sorry but it’s better we talk about it now, please take a seat” He helped me to a seat which I took reluctantly, he sat before me and started the conversation.
“It’s barely four days after our wedding Love and you’ve already resumed work. You told me last week before the wedding that your Boss gave you a week for the honey moon because of that I too deliberately decided to take a week off just so we could spend enough time together but things have not been the way I planned it.
You haven’t been friendly and loving towards me especially after you saw the message my sister sent to me. I have told you the message is not about any concubine or child anywhere……”
“Richard I know. Can I go now?” I interrupted him angrily.
“Please hold on let’s talk as husband and wife.
Okay I promise you anything you want me to do I’ll do it just please let’s stop behaving like strangers around each other”
“You’ll do anything I ask you to do?” I asked.
“Yes, I promise”
“Okay dear, end that your seven days fasting and prayers now and make me a woman even if it’s just for tonight I’m okay, you can continue the fasting and prayers later, I promise you I won’t disturb you” Now that was deliberate.
My husband scratched his head before speaking.
“Babe , you know, I don’t, as in, if I….you may , like I mean….” He had begun to stutter , I kept on staring at him waiting for him to tell me another lie.
“I mean this fasting and prayer is for the benefit of you and I , it’s very much mandatory that I finish this fasting and prayers”
“Mtchew!!!” I hissed and stood up immediately.
“Okay I promise you after I’m through, we’ll consummate our union.
“You think you can hide this secret forever Richard? I already know you have a problem” I blurted out.
“What problem?”
“You are incapable of performing as a man Richard. I know already?”
“Who told you that? That’s not true”
“Don’t you dare deny it Richard. How could you be so wicked, heartless and deceitful? You deceived me.
So all those times we were courting and you were flirting with me, telling me you can’t wait to have me, you can’t wait to do this, you can’t wait to do that, so they were just a way of distracting my attention from your problem?” I said almost at the verge of tears.
“Who fed you with all those lies?”
“Keep asking me”
“Nifemi please don’t give the devil a chance. Whoever it is that is feeding you with all these lies only want to ruin our marriage. Don’t allow them Nife”
“Oh please spare me the gibberish. Soon people will start expecting my tommy to protrude , how do I bear the shame when they begin to question me? Ah Richard I promise you this one you have done, you will pay for it” I stood up and started mounting the stairs, crying along as Richard followed me.
“Babe , babe, wait , babe I said I’m not incapable of performing as a man. I’m capable, I’m man enough. I just want to finish up with this fasting first. Babe listen to me” he held my hands as I was about to shut the bedroom door at him.
My husband pulled me to himself and wrapped me in an embrace as I fought to get out of his grip.
“You deceived me, you lied to me”
“Calm down please, calm down and listen to me. I didn’t deceive you. I love you so much, I’ll never do anything to hurt you, please calm down. I’m not impotent , Sweet please listen”
“How many other shocking revelations are awaiting me in this marriage? Tell me how many other lies would I have to bear?”
“None Babe, just please hear me out first. I said I’m not impotent”
“Then touch me, kiss me, hug me, have sex with me”
“Not yet, I can’t”
“Why?”
“Because I’m fasting”
“You liar! No it’s because you are impotent, you are not a man, you are just another woman with a man figure”
“Stop Nifemi, stop right away” Richard covered his ears with his hands but I was not yet through. I was burning with anger, in the face of the raw truth, my husband was still lying.
“You were a Eunuch from birth who only wanted to drag me into the mess he can’t find solutions to. You are just a useless impotent…..” Richard raised his hands to slap me and I held his shirt daring him to give me the slap. His hand froze in the air as he stared angrily at me,his eyes were red, covered with a mist of tears but I didn’t care.
“Nifemi let go off my shirt” he said calmly as he brought down his hand.
“Beat me up Richard, beat me up. Let the whole world know that you are just a bloody pretender. You have been pretending to the world to be a calm brother not knowing that you are a wife beater. Beat me up because I demanded for my right.
Beat me Richard, you must lay those fingers of yours on me. Let the world know that you beat your wife up barely four days after wedding”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know what came over me, those words were to painful for me to bear.
You know I will never lay a finger on you. Please let me go Nifemi. Don’t give the devil a chance” Tears were flowing from his face as he spoke but I still didn’t care because I too had begun to shed tears.
“Nifemi please leave my shirt. I’m truly sorry, it won’t happen again, please leave my shirt.
You know I can’t beat you up. Please Oluwanifemi” I let go off his shirt and he brought me to sit on our matrimonial bed. I shove his hands off my shoulders after sitting on the bed. He tried to wipe my face with an handkerchief but I didn’t let him.
All my life I had never imagined this kind of scene will come to play in my marriage. I had always looked at couples who fight or quarrel as immature, no wonder the elders normally advise that we don’t give a chance to the devil because any small crack in marriage can cause a great havoc.
Just imagined how I allowed the devil a chance just now.
“I’m truly sorry Nifemi please don’t be offended, I didn’t intend to slap you, I will never slap you Nifemi. I had promised that I will never lay a finger on you to beat you no matter the provocation, I’m sorry I almost broke that promise today but thank God for grace”
I laid on the bed turning my back at him, my shoes were still on my legs,he came closer to pull them off and I almost hit him with the heels. Seven days will soon be over, I kept saying in my mind. Now I understand why some churches insist on going for a test that will prove if both partners are capable of fulfilling each other’s sexual demand. Maybe if I had known I too would have insisted on such test.
“Love is selfless” I heard a voice whispered to my mind but I was too angry to let the Holy Spirit interprete further. I blamed myself thinking if my prayer life had been stronger than this , then who knows maybe God would have warned me ahead and I would have ran for my dear life.
“Ist Corinthians 10:13” I heard the voice saying again but I didn’t know what’s in it and I didn’t bother to check.
The next few days was nothing to write home about. Apart from the normal greetings and one or two other very few mandatory words I said to Richard, we didn’t communicate at all. My parents kept calling to ask of our welfare and I kept assuring them that all was well. At a time Mom sent me a message and asked me to fast because she had a terrifying dream about me. I ignored the message because I was at my low moment, I felt if God really loved me and if I was one of those He answers their prayers then I wouldn’t have been in this condition. I didn’t feel the need for any fasting and prayers.
When Richard realized I wasn’t ready to listen to him, he too resumed back to work immediately.
The following week, on a Wednesday morning , I got to my office and found a bag on my desk, when I checked inside it. It was a nice silver color gown decorated with diamonds.
The gown was extremely beautiful, I knew it will cost a fortune but who could have dropped this expensive gift in my office? I asked no one in particular. I checked inside the bag again and I found a short note written to me.
Who dropped the gift in our darling Nifemi’s office?
1)Richard
2.) Jude
3.) Smith
4) An unknown admirer.