Marriage is like a field and the man and woman are the farmers assigned to work on the field. They are therefore like farmers who have to cultivate their farms.
What will a farmer need in other to make the most of the allotted farm?
- Prepare the land for planting. This requires weeding, clearing, uprooting dead trunks etc.
Dear husband/wife, What are those things you need to clear out of the field of your marriage? Those things that will not allow you enjoy a good harvest e.g. grudge, malice, anger, cheating, dirtiness, laziness, prayerlessness etc. Please think about it, you will be able to identify a few things that need to be cleared. Bend down and start working at clearing your field. No one will do it for you!
- Planting of seeds:
Dear husband/wife, what types of seed are you planting?
Are you sowing kindness, tenderness, consideration, understanding etc or you are sowing harsh words, abuses and curses. Remember, whatever you sow is what you will reap. Let us be conscious of our actions, they are seeds. You want a peaceful home, and then let your words and actions be the type that will bring about peaceful response from your partner.
- Water your plants:
For proper growth, the plant need sunshine, water, nutrients, sometimes fertilizer.
Dear husband/wife, are you providing nourishment for your marriage? What are those things that provide nourishment? Things like romance, friendship, communication, prayers, etc. Be deliberate in investing time and resources in bringing daily nourishment to your relationship. Remember, without all these things, the marriage will die.
- Constant weeding and pruning. Weeds will always show up to contest for the nutrients available for the plants. Please look around and look inwards. What are those things competing for your spouse space in your life? Is that friend of the opposite sex? That job exposing you to alcohol and friends of easy virtues, pornography and other sexual pervasions? Or is it even your ego that needs to be pruned? Or other activities like sports and other activities. Be sincere with yourself, without cutting off some friendships and habit, the marriage will continue to suffer.
- Updated knowledge. A wise farmer needs to keep tap with current trends to know about new farming techniques. Please seek information, seek knowledge, and seek professional counsel. Buy books, listen to CDs, follow helpful blogs and other influencers .Guy, please don’t think counselling is for weak people.. It is strong and wise people that seek help.
May I also warn that you desist from wishing that another man’s field should be yours! The grass always seems greener on the other side. If your neighbour’s farm looks good, then be humble enough to go learn the skills from him. Don’t watch your field being over grown with weeds or being run over by rodents and other destructive animals .Any farm that looks good surely has people who are working hard to achieve the results you see.
Please put on your working shoes and get to work. Take responsibility for your farm. You can’t outsource this assignment. You will succeed in Jesus name!