This is article is written with newly weds in mind. Most of the time, it is just the two of you at home. One of the challenges for busy dual-earner couples is carving out enough time to get the necessary household work done without cutting into personal, couple, and family time. This problem is a source of stress in many relationships. While one solution would be to hire someone to help clean the house, most couples can’t afford this. Even when they can, they may not want the hired hand come into the bedroom for privacy issues. Here are some tips on managing the house chores between the two of you:
Tip #1: prioritize. What really needs to be done and when? Some jobs are clearly more important than others. What must get done each day? What can wait until the weekend? Eg you may not need to sweep the house everyday. But you surely will have to do the dishes daily if you cook.
Tip #2: Make a plan. A little planning can go a long way. Working out a plan of responsibility for household jobs can benefit both spouses in terms of their personal well-being as well as the health of their relationship. Making a plan can also help clarify who is doing the chores that the other may not even know about. You can plan to do certain chores on weekends. If both of you work outside of the home, it will be a show of love to get involved in taking care of the home.
Tip #3: Divide tasks by abilities, interests, and needs. Divide tasks by abilities, interests, and needs, and rather than simply by “men’s work” and “women’s work.” Most couples today are dual earner couples, and the pattern of women doing all the “inside work” is not often viewed as fair. A wiser division of tasks allows for balanced sharing and individual preference. Eg the man may enjoy cleaning the bathroom or ironing clothes or even cooking. Note that even after sharing the task according to interest and skill, some chores may be left untouched. You still have to get them done or outsourced. What gat to be done gat to be done.?
Tip #4: ban micromanaging. Make a rule that whoever does the task can do it his or her way without criticism. In the case of different standards, partners can work to reach a compromise that both can live with. Criticism is a demotivator, avoid it. Appreciation each others effort.
Tip #5: be flexible. Switch household jobs every now and then to minimize boredom. Also, allowing the other person to take responsibility for a household job might reveal some hidden talent or creativity.
On a final note, don’t compare your marriage with Someone else’s, not even with your parent’s. Design a schedule that works for you. Just ensure the two of you are happy with it.